The Weight Loss Adventure – Part 1

With only three months left for our wedding, my fiance and I realized we should hit the gym and get fit (at least that’s what we told everyone). But the real reason was something totally different. Since both of us were working, we were finding it too difficult to make time for each other. Also no one in our family understood why it was such a big deal for us to meet each other every day; but it was a BIG DEAL!!! So, we made a foolproof plan about taking a gym membership together; that way we have a good reason to meet each other every single day.

When I first entered the gym, I realized I had no muscles, no flexibility, no stamina and NO INTEREST. The only appealing factor in that gym was my fiance. So there was no exercise happening and just lot of nonsense chatter until one week later when my fiance announced that his office timings have changed and he would no longer be able to make it to the gym… WHAT!!!!??? By then, I had realized I had already gained 1 kg from the time I started working out which is not good news at all because my wedding gown was already ready and the lady who made the gown told me she would not make any alteration, come what may!! Why can’t things go the way I plan ever??!!

So, now I had appointed a personal trainer to shed that weight and also started following a strict diet where I was literally eating nothing. I hated everything, the gym, the trainer, the treadmill, the exercise cycle, the bench press machine, the machine that helps you stretch, the weights and everything else in that room. There was just one week left for the wedding and I had gained another kg. So, now I’m two kgs heavier than how much I weighed before joining this gym… why Lord why!!!

I somehow managed to fit into my wedding gown (thank God for that) and got happily married. We went on our honeymoon and we ate like we were never ever fed good food before. Back from the honeymoon, I realized I had gained two morekgs and was not happy about it at all. I went back to the gym and booked the best personal trainer and started training with him. Still there was no difference. My weight kept increasing. I did not understand what was the cause of this weight gain – new lifestyle, new food habits or frequent eat out sessions with the new husband?? I was clueless. The weighing machine showed my weight which was now 6 kgs higher than how much I initially weighed and it was now very much visible to everyone around me. I toiled and toiled at this gym every single day and I just kept gaining weight whereas my husband just paid casual visits and lost five kgs. Some said maybe it was the muscle weight – but I felt no muscles anywhere…. Huh!!! Life was beginning to look very unfair. The sight of my husband rejoicing on the weighing scale was so annoying!!

 I was overwhelmed by all the comments I got from people – ‘Chubby Cheeks’, ‘Golu Molu’, ‘It seems you are happy and PROSPEROUS’, ‘Are you REALLY working out??’, ‘This is natural – you put on weight after you get married’  and many others which I do not wish to mention on a public forum. My one year subscription was over at this gym and there I was ‘one year older and seven kgs heavier’. I was battling whether I should renew my subscription or just give up this effort of losing weight. I had never gained so much in a year ever and I knew I had to do something about it. Being short was not helping me with the weight issues. I was beginning to look like a plump little lady and this plump little lady had no plan of what to do next.

I will write soon about the GRAND PLAN.

Until then, LIVE LOVE LAUGH SING DANCE and EAT CUPCAKES!!!

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The One that got AWAY!!

Yes you read it right. I’m going to talk about the one that got away – The one I loved, the one I met every single day, the one who was the dream that almost came true, the one who made me a rebel, the one who made me fight with my family, the one who made me cry at the thought of not being together, the one who made me dream of a life together, the one who I fell in love with at first sight, the one who still pulls the strings of my heart, the one that got away!!

This was during the early days of our marriage. My husband, my brother-in-law and I were the three musketeers in town. We had money, no responsibility and lot of free time, so we would be all over the town. One fine evening, when we were just loafing around, we stumbled upon a pet shop. We decided to walk in with no intention of falling in love. As soon as we entered, we saw a beautiful yellow Labrador puppy playing around. It was the cutest thing and it instantly stole our hearts. Now, my husband and I have had traumatic experiences (at least that’s what we say) with dogs in our childhood days; so we had lost the ability to love dogs and also we were somewhat scared of the cute little thing. The puppy had no such inhibitions about us and it came and licked our feet playfully. She had the cutest eyes and she convinced me to take her home. I had decided a name for her too – Pouchie (because she was so tiny she could fit into my pouch… lol).  From the owner of the shop I got to know that Pouchie was always hungry and this led me to firmly believe that she was just like us – Ever hungry and Food lover. We walked out of the store promising Pouchie that we would be back. As we sat back in our car to leave, I saw her peeking out of the door as if she was wondering why we were not taking her with us already.

Once, we were out of the area, things began to change. Everyone started wondering if this was a good idea. Since our family is huge, we have huge number of advice and concerns floating in from all the directions. Nobody was happy with our decision of buying a dog. I felt my dream fading away as my family started reasoning and thinking practically. They said it’s too much responsibility, somebody has to be there the whole time to watch the dog, we cannot take vacations, we have to take her outside every day, we will have to spend too much on her maintenance, dogs are emotional creatures and they get depressed without company and loads of other reasons. None of the solutions I gave were of any use.

Nevertheless, I still tried to be positive that my family would change their mind. I visited many stores to enquire about dog food and pet accessories for my dear Pouchie. We visited her regularly and I saw my fear of dogs vanishing when I looked into her beautiful deep mesmerizing eyes. I was determined to take her home with me and prayed that my family would accept her too. There was lot of chaos about Pouchie and we had our final family meeting. It was me against the whole family. I was almost 24 and still nobody was able to believe that I can take full responsibility of a dog. These are the same people who have no problem believing that I can take full responsibility of a baby. The last statement was made by my mother who said, “Dogs don’t live for longer period of time and you won’t be able to handle the loss.” I had no response to that statement and finally decided to give up.

To make things worse, they aired ‘Marley and Me’ that weekend. I decided not to go to the store ever and I never did. I prayed that Pouchie would go to a very loving family – a family that would take care of her better than me. I missed her and it made me feel awful. My husband got me a baby tortoise to get me out of the depression, but that did not help much. I love my ‘Oogway’ but she does not roll, bark, cuddle or wait for me to get back home. Pouchie’s place is still vacant.

My daughter, who is just a year old now seems to love dogs. She gets really excited when she sees ‘Goggy’ (that’s what she calls all the dogs).  I hope that someday my daughter would grow up to love dogs and would be able to convince her father better than me to get one.

We face many situations where we give up on things we love, our passions, our dreams fearing failure. The thought of losing Pouchie seemed unbearable to me then. But, now when I think about it, I know I would have lived an awesome life with Pouchie and I’m sure it would have been AMAZING. The fear of death does not stop us from falling in love, making new friends, having babies, owning a vehicle or taking new risks. So why should that stop me from letting a dog be a part of my life.

Someone rightly said ‘Life is short, play with your dog!!!’ I hope someday a cute little Pouchie will be a part of our perfect little family. Until then, with hope I’ll carry on!!

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Things you realize only after getting married!!!

There are few many things which you begin to realize only after getting married. I knew my better half for more than two years before getting married. He seemed like the perfect man and I’m assuming he too had similar thoughts about me. In college, he was always well dressed, well groomed, had different file folders for different subjects with labels on them(woah!!), spoke well, always wore good perfume, always had money in his wallet (lol) and a perfectionist. Anyway, every story has a perfect fairy tale ending because it ends with the Prince and Princess getting married. It never talks about the next day after the big wedding. So, I have decided to pen down random thoughts that paraded my mind the NEXT DAY.

All of a sudden, you have to share everything with your husband, starting with the toothpaste. When I was not married, I had the freedom of squeezing out the toothpaste however I liked. As long as the end result is achieved, i.e the toothpaste is on the toothbrush, I really don’t care about the technical details.   But now, this husband of mine is already being judgmental about the way the toothpaste tube looks and he goes ahead and comments on the way my toothbrush looks after I have used it. And trust me, it’s been seven years and this discussion still happens.

One would assume that a person with so much perfection would be flawless in everything. I learnt a very important lesson that nothing is predictable in marriage. As we happily flew down to Kerala for our honeymoon, little did I know that my husband packed his bag just few minutes before boarding the flight. My bag was packed for Kerala a month before our wedding and I was still worried if I had forgotten something, but my husband, on the other hand, did not pack anything of importance and we had to go shopping straight from the airport even before going to the hotel. Now, it was my turn to be judgmental about how can a person manage to be so casual. This continues to remain the same too. In fact, it has become worse as I cannot tolerate procrastination and end up packing for both of us. Of course, once the packing is done, the perfectionist finds faults and everything has to be redone.

I love beaches, he loves hill stations.

I love chicken, he loves mutton

I love continental, he loves Chinese

I love watching romantic movies, he loves action

I love reading, he loves music

I love swimming, he totally hates it

I love going out, he likes staying in

I love parks, he loves malls

What on earth are we supposed to do together!!!???

Whenever I think about our marriage, I realize that God has a beautiful sense of humour. He makes two people who are not at all similar to each other, fall in love with each other so much that by the time they realize that they are so different than the other person, they are already married. BOOM!!

Does the love fade away with this realization?? Not at all!!

His passion for music inspired me to learn music. My love for swimming encouraged him to try even though getting wet is not his favorite thing. Sometimes he takes me out; sometimes we stay home and watch TV. I started eating Chinese with him; he started eating Continental with me. Sometimes we watch romantic movies and sometimes action movies. We enjoy hill stations in summer and beaches in winter. The monotonous life that I had with my own passions and interests has now acquired new flavor as my husband’s passions and interests got added to it. Life is now sweet and spicy, just the way I like it. Some believe that Marriages are made in Heaven and I truly agree to that. Only God can find that missing puzzle piece which is so different yet  fits  so perfectly into your life!!

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It’s a boy!!! It’s a girl!!!

Dreaming – well that is my thing. Some dreams are meaningful, some are just random. I had this dream during my early days of marriage that I was standing with a group of unfamiliar people wearing a white salwar kameez. I felt someone tugging on my dupatta. As I turned back, I saw a little boy who looked exactly like my husband. The little boy smiled at me and called me ‘Mommy’ and that was the end of the dream. I fell madly deeply in love with that little boy in my dream. Somehow, I always felt I was going to have a son. It was a long wait after that and when I got pregnant, I was so curious to find out if it was going to be a boy or a girl and the old wives tales I got to hear from almost everyone around me didn’t help much. It is just so hilarious now when I think about all the predictions made by my friends and family.

So, it started with me not having morning sickness at all. I was never sick. Generally, pregnant women struggle a lot during their first trimester with nausea and cannot eat at all. But I was hogging religiously from day one. So, everyone said it’s a boy because it’s a smooth pregnancy. My family was truly amazed by my food intake and weight gain. I had gained 16 kilos in 9 months which again led to the confirmation that it is going be a boy baby as boys eat more. Really!!!!

Some people would say my face is glowing, so it’s going to be a boy and some would say I look tired and look horrible, so it’s going to be a boy. Phew!! Some said that it is a boy because I am carrying all out front and not on the sides while others said if the baby’s heartbeat is less than 140 beats per minute (which was always between 120 and 135 in my case) , it’s  a boy.

There were some predictions also made about the baby’s hair. Like I said, I never had morning sickness; so there were chances that my baby had no hair on his head. Also, they said that if there was itching sensation on the stomach, the baby has a lot of hair. Since, I had none of these symptoms, I was pretty sure I was having a bald baby boy.

We had a guessing game in our Baby Shower where people had to guess the baby’s gender. There was no surprise there. Except for three people (including me), everybody else predicted a baby boy.

My husband and I were hunting for a perfect name for our son and we couldn’t find any. The only name that we both loved and agreed upon was ‘Rebecca’. We hoped that we will have a baby girl next time and we shall name her ‘Rebecca’.

It was time for the mystery to be revealed and we still had no name for our baby boy. I was waiting for my bald little baby boy and the Doctor said, “Jenefa, you have a beautiful baby girl.” What???? My baby was beautiful and perfect and had lot of hair. My husband was equally surprised but we couldn’t have been happier. At that point of time, it really did not matter whether it was a boy or girl. A healthy baby was all that mattered. We just had too many reasons to celebrate – Baby Rebecca’s Arrival and Christmas!!!

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The Big Three Zero

Last Sunday Night, I was returning back home from our Church Service. I was driving the car and my husband was sitting next to me. We were on the Palm Beach Road, which is considered to be one of the best roads to drive in Mumbai. My brother, who was on his bike was also on the same road. He was driving at a speed greater than the speed limit which is not unusual. My brother was accompanied by my brother-in-law. Now, our family is a big family and my stories are never complete until I have mentioned most of them. My husband made fun of my brother and said, “Look at your brother – Raging Hormones!!!” I instantly replied saying, “Look at YOUR brother – AGING Hormones!!” And we laughed and laughed and laughed until we realized that my brother is only 24 and my brother in law is only 27 and both I and my husband are much older. We both have turned 30 this year. My husband is just 5 months older than me and I had a good laugh when it was his 30th birthday and made sure to make fun of his age at least for the next 5 months.

But as they say ‘Age is not how old you are, but how many years of fun you had!!’ I sure have enjoyed my life to the fullest and that is all that matters. I am still able to do the things which I did when I was twenty and have the ability to do much more.

So, Just Keep Calm and enjoy your 30th birthday because you are going to turn 30 only once. Live Love Laugh!! Continue reading